September 2, 2012

Obey my rules, else you don't love me

Let me draw a scene for you (I am horrible at drawing, and I have the writing skill of a Philips's screwdriver) which may occur at any household that consists of the usual parents, and some kid around the age of say... 21? Alright, that's a count of three humans for this scenario. Let's do this!
 < Le dinner table >
KID: I am going out with my friends this Saturday.

DAD: No you are not.

KID: Why am I no supposed to go? lol.

DAD: I have a big moustache and you'll do as I say. I don't need to give you a reason. You are but a kid.

KID: At the age of 21, I kinda find this a bit insulting... regardless, ummm... this is not up for discussion. I am not asking you for your permission, merely informing you of my weekend plans, like every other kid.

MOM: You are an ungrateful offspring. You are supposed to obey your father till you are married and then you have to obey your husband.

KID: I feel a bit nauseated... You, being a woman, that too an extremely educated one and having a ridiculously high post in a big firm, I can't believe you just said that. Is that what this is all about, obeying rules?

MOM: You are just a kid, you don't understand. Yes, if you don't obey the "rules", you don't respect us. If you don't respect us, you don't love us.

KID: Alright, lol. Before you start amassing that dowry that you strongly believe that you need to give off to my "rightful" husband, and be an obedient wife and perfectly be happy with the concept of dowry in the first place because being a woman, I am now his "problem" and the dowry money is perfectly justified... <woah, that was a long pre-clause>... would you elaborate "obey the rules".

DAD: Well, basically, you have to do pretty much anything we tell you to. We know what's best for you as we are your parents and we have your best interests. Regardless of want you want in life, we already have a plan set for you. We are already looking for a good match for you. We check for genetics.

KID: Woah... neat :) So, I'll definitely be happy if I had to wed a guy with proper DNA and education and job, because that's exactly how relationships work... it's in our DNA, isn't it? It's the same as breeding cows and dogs. Cool!

MOM: You don't understand anything. You are just a kid. You will understand everything when you grow up.

KID: Indeed, at 21, there's a lot more to learn... but I really thought I had the basics of life down. Damn :( Before we digress any further and break further the fourth wall, which we have done a splendid job of maintaining *rolls eyes*, what happens if I do not "obey" your rules?

DAD: Well, firstly this question shouldn't even arise, nonetheless, if you do not obey our rules, that equates to you disrespecting us, which in turn flat out tells us that you do not love us as your parents. All of our effort and resources put into raising you would be a waste and we would be very sad that our offspring is now a renegade.

KID: Let me get this straight... As long I do what you say, I "love" my parents and am an obedient kid. The moment I "stray from my path", I am a blemish to the family name.

MOM: Yes. You are just a kid. You will understand everything when you grow up.

KID: Sooooo... why can't I see my friends on Saturday? O_o

DAD: I have a big moustache and my word is final. I do not have to explain myself.

MOM: You are just a kid. You will understand everything when you grow up.

Obey Rules -> Respect -> Love
Obviously, the KID is a rougue. How dare the offspring claim "freedom of choice". Blasphemy! The KID owes KID's parents for raising the KID. The KID is obliged. Arguments such as "it's the duty and responsibility of the parent to raise offspring once you have them, else get the tubes tied" is again blasphemous. The KID should forever be indebted to PARENTS and hence must "obey the rules" regardless of logic.

One who has the biggest moustache at home, is in charge. His wife shall serve the house as that saves on paying for a maid. If you are a female human, you shall do the same at your genetically chosen husband's place. It's a known fact the PARENT's know what's best for you. Come on! everyone knows that good DNA and a good job equals a good married live. The KID is just too young, the KID is just 21, the KID will know when the KID grows up.

The KID had a job. The KID moved out of home and moved in with KID's partner. They lived happily ever after. The PARENTS exploded in utter disbelief that freedom to chose one's life decisions was not just a myth and the sheer fact that the KID was living with the KID's partner without being wed.

Obligation and love don't appear on the same page. The sooner people realize that, the better your family life will be.